Martial Arts are Not Self-Defence

One of the most common questions you’ll find in self-defence forums, groups, or discussions is “Is this art good for self-defence?” Instantly what happens is practitioners of that art will jump in and say how it has amazing benefits and it’s a perfect solution, while those who practise other arts will retort about its shortcomings….

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Assertive Courtesy: A 21st Century Technique to Managing Conflict

In the field of verbal self-defence (alternatively called conflict management, verbal de-escalation, tactical communication, or any other buzz word that suits you) there is an ongoing dichotomy between two of the most common pieces of general advice offered. 1)   Treat the other party with respect 2)   Being polite will get you killed Before I offer my approach…

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“Calm down!” and other dumb things we say when trying to calm people down

Let’s get one thing out in the open straight away. No one in the history of calming down has anyone ever calmed down after being told to calm down. Not ever. Ever ever ever. Never happened. But it’s still the first thing that comes out of our mouths when we’re exasperated by someone’s behaviour. Hell,…

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